Tuesday, 27th October
It is so different seeing how a
hospital operates from the other side. I went to see Ben in the
morning, he was doing well. They changed the bandages again when I
was there and they are very happy with his progress. He had no fever
this morning, he has no pain and can eat a little.
I went across the street to the
hotel. Well, it is a bit longer than across. Right opposite the
hospital is a cemetery, which I always thought is a bit macabre.
So I went across to the hotel to
have some lunch. Sonja from the events team recognised me and came
over. She was very nice when she heard Ben is not well. We actually
have not decided on a menu yet, and I warned her he might need
special treatment on the day. He cannot have bubbly drinks, no
alcohol, and it would be best if he has smaller portions. She said
that will be no problem at all, and we can confirm this nearer the
time. It really is a lovely spot, I must thank Ingrid for showing it
to him.
In the afternoon Ben was still free
of fever and we went up and down the corridor. He had to lean onto
me, or maybe he pretended? It was nice to be able to hold him. Dr
Fahji thinks, if he keeps improving, I can take him home Friday
evening or Saturday morning.
I talked to Barbara yesterday, of
course she is very concerned. I assured her Ben has the best
treatment. Robert wanted to talk as well, Skype is sometimes not a
good idea, one cannot hide facial expressions. There is medication
which slows the disease down, but he does not take it. He said he is
sad to miss Ben's birthday, and I should give him a special long hug
and kiss from him. It is so painful to think about what will happen.
Ben and I have had such a bad time lately, am I selfish when I say I
want Robert to hang on as long as possible for our sake?
Wednesday, 28th October
I went to the gym and had a long
session. I saw Sabine, I had forgotten to tell her about Ben. She ill
visit him this afternoon. I am enjoying to have some extra time. I
went to the house and checked everything. I had gardeners in to do
the hedges. I am going to see Ben later.
I had his birthday all planned. I
have a special collar for him, which used to be mine, it is a unique
design, which is self locking. The collar goes around the neck, and
has a buckle, then there is a strap, which can be at the front or at
the back. One puts their hands in and if you pull down, it locks.
I used to love it. I have had it
repaired and polished.
I have ordered him some books about
European history, I checked with Barbara what is his special interest
. We did spend some time in a book shop in London, and he was sad he
could not buy many.
He likes to read before he goes to
sleep.
Thursday, 29th October
What a strange day we had.
Ben's recovery is going very well,
he has been fever free since Tuesday. He still has a bit pain, but
mostly from moving around. He still gets antibiotics. He needs to be
on antibiotics for a week, but they would be happy for me to do it at
home. They just need to make sure his digestion works well, and he
slowly increases his food intake, with a mixture of liquid and solid.
Of course I could not bring all the
presents into the hospital. I did bring my laptop in to show Ben the
messages from Canada. He is still having his tea party, we asked
everyone to come for 4pm, but definitely not earlier. Around 3pm is a
lull, when staff are busy with other things, so Ben had some peace
and quiet to watch his messages. It was hard to watch him. I felt
such an outsider. I had offered to leave, but he wanted me there. He
asked me how Robert is, the message had clearly been recorded some
months ago. I had to be honest with him. I told him I saw him on
Skype on Monday
and was shocked by his appearance.
He was out of breath quickly when he talked to me. I think it will be
very soon. Ben just went his usual quiet. I wanted to hug him, but
he went stiff. He has never done that before. I asked if he wanted
some time alone, and he just nodded. I stood in front of the door so
that I could make sure no-one enters; and to listen out for him. I
still get jealous, am I horrible?
It was nearly 4pm, so I knocked and
entered the room shortly afterwards. The boy was in the bathroom,
washing his face. Soon his friends arrived, and we went to the
lounge. They had supplied everything, chocolate cake, tea and coffee,
balloons, candles. We sang happy birthday and he looked exceedingly
happy. We had agreed no presents, but everyone had brought something
anyway. Sabine brought a Tibetan prayer flag, Ingrid her old book of
Pippi Longstocking, and Per and Lasse are knitting him a jumper in a
traditional design, it is not finished, they needed to try it for
size. He was overwhelmed and was crying again. We took a nice photo.
After an hour he was tired, I took him back to his room and then went
home with all his presents.
Friday, 30th October
I went to the hospital in the
afternoon, Ben had seen Dr Fahji in the morning, he is very happy
with the progress and I can take him home Saturday. I am enjoying my
time off.
Saturday, 31st October
We came home late morning. He
wanted to put his belt on and a plug in. He had asked me to bring him
a plug into the hospital, but I had refused. During the week he said
to me, he wished I could be more of a Master in public, like the
situation with the photo, he is used to it. In his small town in
Canada the slaves were taken into public restrained, and only
strangers stared. Well, this is Stockholm, and despite our reputation
for free sex and liberal attitudes, like most places, BDSM is still
an awkward topic for people. I responded that I will try, but being a
24/7 Master is pretty new for me and I am not as confident as he is
to broadcast it. We went into his room and I helped him get the belt
on, and I had chosen a plug for him. He made me so horny, and I knew
he was as well, we had a good fuck up his vagina, he hand to hold
onto to the bars of his cell as if his life depended on it.
I had prepared the presents, I
already put the books on his shelves, so he only noticed them after a
while, and was very surprised. He liked them very much. I showed him
the collar, he loved it and tried it out immediately. I bought him
some nipple rings, which we put in. It was a bit fiddly and I caused
him some pain, but he likes a bit of pain. I made us lunch, he ate
well. He is getting his antibiotics via an IV, due to his diet
tablets would not have the same effect, he cannot absorb all of the
medication properly. After lunch I put his IV in. Always makes me a
bit uncomfortable, medicating him professionally. He opted to have it
in his cell, while he rested a bit. “Normal” people probably
baulk at the thought that he has a cell, but he is used to it, and it
is his safe place. He asked if we can do some bondage, I told him to
wait at least until tomorrow.
Later in the afternoon he wanted to
record some messages to his Canadian family. We had fun doing that,
he wanted to show the flat, and he was very enthusiastic, he was
describing his home. We recorded separate messages for slave
no1, Barbara and then he wanted to record something for Robert by
himself. After quite some time he came into the living room, handed
me the camera and said could I send the messages, but he needed more
time to do the message for Robert.
I just sent the videos, they were
small enough files to be e-mailed. I have notified them another film
will follow.
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