A good day at university

Tuesday, 21^st March

My lecture today went well, I have put in a lot of studying the last 2 days. I am at home now and am going to meditation soon. Ben was very good yesterday, keeping quiet as he did the housework, bringing me drinks and food and made me go for a walk to take a break.

The students were 1^st year, and I gave an introduction lecture on anaesthesia, they will be students of mine when I properly start in May. At least it was my favourite subject, put there were certain things the university had on the study plan I had to get across. My next few lectures will be to older students and on different subjects, which I will need to brush up on. They have already allocated me an office space, and I am getting to know the building and some fellow staff. It felt good to be doing something worthwhile at last.

Start of spring today, at least according to the calendar. It has been very cold lately, and cloudy. Actually maybe we should invite Per and Lasse for a meal, we have not seen much of them lately, and I know Lasse will be struggling with depression in this weather.

We are getting a delivery of wood tomorrow, we have the fire on most nights.

Sunday at home

Sunday, 19^th March

We had a very rewarding time in the playroom yesterday. I think we were both starved of a good bondage session, and Ben was very flexible and gave himself to me, as usual. He is almost too compliable, I do try to come up with scenarios he cannot predict, but he knows me well and anticipates what I am doing. We actually did not have sex, it does not always end up with sex. Good bondage does not mean sex, it means bondage.

Ben has changed his rota, he cleans himself in the morning, it makes more sense, it gives him much more freedom and time in the evening. I think it might actually be better for his health as well, he has put on a bit of weight since he changed about 3 months ago. He asked me this morning if we can do a long term bondage scene, maybe with the help of some other people. I asked what he means by long term, he said 3 or 4 days, maybe being in a straitjacket and a cell, minimum contact. I quite like the idea, I would use the flat for that though. I have not done anything yet about letting it out.

I have my first lecture on Tuesday, I will have to work on that today, and I have a test to do before Tuesday. Ben has arranged to meet Ingrid this afternoon, as I have work to do.

Update

Saturday, 18^th March

We had our first M/s night at the new club, it was great. It sometimes feels as if we dishonoured the old members and the ethos of the club, but times change, people want a different experience, and I do think it is what Arne would have wanted. Average age at a M/s night is in the early forties, I would say, but then it is a lifestyle which takes time to develop. Younger people are just playing at it. Sven has a new beau, but is not ready to present him yet. He said it is very early stages, it is not his usual kind of guy.

I have had a busy week, I attended a lecture and did 2 shifts at the health centre where I was twice before. I have been to the gym at different times, I have been so used to my time slot, it felt strange walking in when there were unfamiliar people there. I also have my studying to do, so Ben felt rather neglected this week. I will make it up to him this afternoon and evening. He is trying to come up with a new interest he could take up, he thought he might start knitting. Lasse knits and could show him. I would encourage him to take up another class, I think he would like to be intellectually challenged.

Making plans

Monday, 13^th March

I was contacted today by my old boss if I am available around Easter holidays. At first I was going to say no, as Ruth will be here, but Ben encouraged me to say yes. So I told my boss that we are having a visitor from overseas, so if they can consider that and give me shifts which leave me with some time to spend with her, then yes. I have arranged a few dates to go to the university to sit in on lectures and my own lectures I need to do for the course. Funnily enough, the agency called me today as well if I can cover some shifts, I have managed to squeeze them in as well. I am bored of being at home! The weather has been miserable!

Ben is helping with Django again the next few weeks, he will walk him Friday and Monday afternoons.

Out and about

Sunday, 12^th March

Today is the anniversary of Lizzi and her baby's death. Ben wanted to light a candle for her, we walked to the local church and arrived just after a service had finished. It was good to have fresh air for so long, my cold is almost over, I feel energetic again. Yesterday we went to see the dance show of Kristoffer's girlfriend, I actually enjoyed it very much. Ben did as well. It was modern dance, several short pieces. It is amazing how much control dancers have over their body, how they can remember the routine. But I guess when this is what you do all day then it is normal.

In the afternoon we were at the club, during the week it has been busy, more than it would have been at the old club during the week, I guess people are still coming to check it out. Anyway, Stefan showed us the photos he took and the video footage. We selected a few to put on the website and to display at the club. He gave us a copy of the footage from our long session at the house. He has been busy producing his own films, and did not have time to edit ours. He said it is not much anyway, if we want to do something like that again, we need to adjust the angle of the cameras.

I am planning a little session later, Ben has had it too vanilla for quite some time now, he is getting a bit restless. But we have been busy and then my cold really floored me. I guess all the vitamins I gave him earlier this year paid off, as he has not got the cold – yet.

I'm ill

Thursday, 9^th March

I am feeling very miserable, Ben is looking after me wonderfully, but staying away, he does not want to get the cold. I hope he can avoid it. I miss him, I have been very touchy feely lately, even holding hands when we were on that walk on Sunday. Ben seems to like it, but he rarely initiates it.

I very much noticed his absence on Tuesday, the house was so big without him. I did not go to meditation, but had encouraged him to go. So I did not see him from the morning until nearly 10pm!

At least I have been able to get on with my studies. Between his classes and Ingrids extra homework he is quite busy with his own studies.

Yeah, a quiet day!

Monday, 6^th March

We had a meeting with all the staff at the club to talk about our first few days trading and to see if there are any major and small problems. Basically everyone thought it had gone well, it was exceptionally busy and would not be so busy on a regular night, so the staff should be able to work well. They decided to change the layout of the bar slightly and we have re-arranged some furniture. We really want to concentrate on the outside now and get that ready for our customers.

I have started my online course, I think it will be more involved then what I had expected, but I like the challenge. The neighbour posted us the residents association newsletter, it is actually quite interesting. I guess I am getting old and boring. I am definitively getting a cold, no surprise after the last few days that my immune system is run down.

A busy opening weekend!

Sunday, 5^th March

We have had a very busy few days. Friday evening, the opening went well, it was extremely busy. Everyone wanted to talk to me, I kept pointing out I am now one of 3 owners, talk to Martin as well!

I guess the adrenaline kicked in, and we stayed till closing time. The show was very good and was very welcomed. Stefan took lots of photos. Ben helped out by collecting and washing glasses. We need to get a move on to get the outside finished, a lot of people were standing outside as it was so crowded inside, we had a bit of a problem keeping count of how many people were inside, which we need to do to conform with regulations. Well, it will not be as busy every night!

I really hope we did not upset our neighbours, there were a lot of taxi journeys late at night. The taxi companies were certainly happy and making a mint!

Martin sent me and Ben home just after 1am, we had to close at 1am. We took a taxi home and had a cup of tea before going to bed. We were buzzing and reviewed the evening. We both concluded it was so unreal that one cannot say what needs to be changed. Bring on Saturday evening!

We both got up relatively early, about 9am, I think Ben was up before. We had a quick breakfast and then I went to the gym and sauna, and Ben did some shopping. We met in town and had some lunch together, then we went home and had a rest, ready to go back to the club again. As proprietors we had an obligation to be there, and we knew it would be busy again.

We were there in the early evening, we were not open yet and the staff had just finished setting up. Martin already had a list with a drinks order, luckily we still had enough of everything. We talked about how we can run the door better, but decided to just let it be for one more night. About 8pm it was busy, Ben was helping out behind the bar again, washing glasses, cutting lemon and stocking up. He seemed to enjoy it. Everyone squeezed in for the show, the lads did impersonations of us owners. It was very funny. Taxi drivers were prepared for us Saturday, and there was a queue of taxis at closing time. We stayed on and helped with the clearing up and ordered a taxi about 2am. Ben was in the office, almost asleep. I got him and the fresh cold air woke him up. He was giggly and seemed a bit spaced out. I was wondering if he was drunk or if someone had spiked his drink. He told me he loved me and was very grateful for the live I have enabled him to have here in Stockholm. He is the happiest he has ever been. I noticed the taxi driver was intently listening to our conversation, as we were nearly at home I told Ben to be quiet, we could talk at home.

We were both very tired, and after getting a glass of water, Ben decided he wanted to go straight to bed, I sat up a bit longer, calming my mind and then fell into bed as well.

In the morning I could not hear any noises, I got up and checked the kitchen, it did not look as if the boy had been up yet. I knocked on his door, and entered soon after. He was still in his bed, he pulled his blanket over his head when I came in. I asked if he was feeling ok, he said yes, he was just embarrassed about last night, what he had said in the taxi. I assured him it was ok, it was actually nice what he had said. I suggested we have a shower and then breakfast. He admitted he had already been up to do yoga. We used my shower, it was nice to wash each other. Once we had dried each other, I got on my knees and gave him a blow job. At first he was hesitant, but then gave in and relaxed. After breakfast I suggested we go for a walk, the sun was shining, I thought some fresh air would be good for both of us. I suggested we take Django, which Ben was very enthusiastic about. I called Stine and Torben, and they were very happy for us to come and fetch him. They were doing some decorating and Django was in the way, they had just talked about asking us if we can take him for the day. When we came out of the house we noticed a sign going up next door for an open day today, we decided to have a look when we came back from our walk.

We picked up Django and went to the restaurant we sometimes go to, they have a covered terrace where we could go with Django. We had some tea, when another couple with a dog came in, Django and the other dog were snarling at each other. I took Django out while Ben paid. It is very unusual for Django to not get on with another dog, but on the way home we had another fight! I am glad I was holding him, I am stronger than Ben, Django might have pulled him over. Ben was good to manage him though, one can notice he is used to handling a big dog. We were to keep Django with us all day, when we came home we let him in (he is only allowed in the hallway), and went next door to the open day. We were the first “customer”, and explained to the agent we are the neighbours. The house is on for a very cheap price, the agent said it is to attract families who want to use it as a weekend house. The grounds slope down to the lake shore, and it has a small beach, another neighbour told us it was a boatyard once, and the slope is where they launched the boats.

We talked about what would most likely happen to the house, our neighbour was very knowledgeable about planning. He told us he is very active in the residents association, which takes a keen interest in preserving the island from over development. I said I did not even know there was a residents association, and the neighbour remembered it was founded when I was in the States, and Arne fell out with the member who delivers the newsletter, that is probably why we never had a newsletter. A lot of residents here have lived here for a very long time, and a lot of plots have still very old, small houses. Money is now moving onto the island and flashy houses are being built. Of course we are a bit worried who will move in next door, and if we will be able to use our garden how we want. On the other side we have a couple who are both authors, and they are very reclusive.

While we had been talking to the neighbour in the garden, many people had been to look at the house, some commented on our hedge and expressed their dislike. Ha, it is on my land, they cannot do anything about it!

When we came back home we decided to have a snack and have a proper meal in the late afternoon. I made the food while Ben suggested he play with Django in the garden while it is still light. He wanted a fruit smoothie, he was getting peckish, and I had some as well. It was nice watching Ben and Django play together, I guess I have to give in soon and we will get a dog.

I had brought some wood in, we had been using our fire place quite a bit this winter, I have to get some more. We had our snack and caught up on the news. Ben fought sleep, he insisted he rather wanted to go to bed early than have a nap in the afternoon.

As it was getting dark I took Django for a walk, he had indicated he needed to go out. When I came back my father was there! Apparently he had a business trip to Stockholm last minute, had flown in this morning and decided on a whim to visit. He had never been to the house before, he had seen the flat. Ben had started dinner and was preparing a fire. He is very good at lighting the fire.

I was not pleased to have a surprise visit and made it pretty clear to my father. Ben suggested he can leave us alone, I wanted him to stay. Conversation was actually going well, I remembered how Ben fell out with his family and made an effort. Ben had mentioned earlier how he missed not being able to ask his father about a few issues. Ben signalled to me, he wanted to know how many people he was cooking for. He had made a stew, which was plenty, but he was making mashed potatoes and vegetables. He needed my help mashing the potatoes, he is not strong enough. My father enjoyed the meal and company. He left soon after the meal, we took Django back and then had a nice bath together. After the bath we lay on the bed, cuddling, and Ben went to his bed after a while. I stayed up until the fire died down and am now going to bed as well.

A few important decisions

Friday, 3^rd March

So I went to the University today, there had been a change of staff, the request to enrol me on the course had been missed in the handover, they sorted it immediately. I wanted to meet with Mr Granat to disclose my involvement with the club. It had suddenly occurred to me that it might become knowledge and reflect badly on me, some institutions need their staff to disclose outside business interests. Mr Granat said it was good of me to disclose it, he did not see a problem, but it was better to know it in advance in case someone, a student, a parent, a colleague, a member of the governing board, would find offence. Basically my private life should not interfere with my academic life, but I'd rather it was out there. I also mentioned that I am considering going back to work at the hospital, but that the plan is for me to work around my duties at the university, and again he said that was perfectly ok., most specialities are being taught by working doctors, and they prefer it that way. He gave me some more details of the dates, and the curriculum I have to teach, so I can prepare my classes. He said I am very welcome to come and sit in some lectures, to get tips how to do it, and nearer the time I will have an induction and a training session on the technology.

Tonight is our official opening, I am not in the mood for it. Maybe I am coming down with a cold, I feel a bit lethargic. I had a long night on Wednesday, I just cannot get excited about tonight. It feels we opened on Wednesday, so why do it again tonight? We have some press there, and some people have even travelled from abroad, it is only a bar! Ok, we have a professional DJ, and Kristoffer's girlfriend and some mates are doing a show (which they suggested to us, they did not want any money, but we still gave them a donation). Our own dance troupe will perform tomorrow night. I guess we will be expected to be there tomorrow as well, no!! I have had a busy few days and would rather spend some quality time with Ben in the playroom, we have been rather busy the last few weeks, and there has not been much time for a good session. He did get a session in his sleep sack in the living room on Monday, and we both enjoyed it, but it was a quiet evening in.

The bar opens and other plans for life

Thursday, 2^nd March

I met with the accountant and Mr Allender today, Mr Allender has organised all the permits with the council to get the house painted. We had 3 quotes, and I just needed to give the go ahead. It will be done in June. I told them that we will be permanently residing at the house and we want to rent out the flat, probably doing some work to make it more appealing. I would like to put Ben onto the deeds for the house and the townhouse. I had altered my will when we got married, and basically I do not need to put his name on the deeds, but he still calls the houses “yours”.

We have received the money for the old club, and I have paid Ben back most of his money. The accountant had recommended some investments for his money, it is divided into different places, so he can access some of it at short notice without paying penalties, and some of it is long term.

Yesterday we went to the flat to start tidying, and I actually missed the car. I am sure we will get used to not having it quickly. I have to remember to carry more cash if I want a taxi, the journey to the new club is a bit awkward on public transport, so we will probably use more taxis, especially at night.

Our first night trading experienced a few problems. I think if we had not experienced problems, I would have been too nervous to open. The staff are still getting used to the new layout of the bar and the till, which was to be expected. They broke quite a bit of glass, Martin assured me that has to be, no broken glass means bad luck. The glass washer flooded, the builders should be able to rectify that today, and someone got locked into a toilet as the lock got stuck. Otherwise we had good feedback, especially about the sound system and lighting. We have a chill out room, where people can come away from the music, and as requested, a room where they can come for some special time, which still needs suggestions for improvement. We initially did not want a room like that, but it was quite high on the members wish list. If it does not work out, we have other uses for it.

Some people complained it was out of the way. It is a bit further to go, but then the original club was a good 10 minutes walk from a train station, this is a bit further, but there is a bus. We have circulated our details to some taxi companies. We have already noticed we need to improve our lighting outside on the access drive for people walking to the road, but we need permission from the council if we want lighting higher up, something to do with light pollution.

Kristoffer and his girlfriend have moved in, although the flat needs a bit more work, but they had given notice at their old flat. They are young, they can cope.

Ben went home before me, as he had class this morning. I stayed until closing and then Martin, Kristoffer and I stayed to review the evening. I did not see Ben this morning, as I slept, he left me a nice breakfast. He called me later to make sure I was up, ready for my appointment.

I am meeting with Mr Granat tomorrow, I have not had my details for the course yet, but there is something else I want to talk to him about.

We have moved back to the house

Monday, 27^th February

We moved back in yesterday. The plan was to to take some stuff, but after we had taken quite a few boxes on Saturday, it felt even worse there Saturday evening. We did not stay in the flat, we went out for dinner, which was actually a very nice evening, and then the boy shared a bed with me, all night!

I woke up twice and it was so nice having him lie there. I was tempted to wake him up for sex, but waited until the morning, and we made love for a couple of hours!

We still have to fetch some stuff, and of course it needs to be cleaned. But basically we are at the house now, and I will have to make sure I make this officially our main and only residence.

Yesterday afternoon, after our last trip, moving suitcases, the boy was not very well. We had just come in and he needed his bathroom. Carrying boxes uses abdominal muscles which causes his guts to go into overdrive. I unpacked, and finally made some peppermint tea, which soothes his digestive system. He was stretched out on his cot, he was grateful for the tea. I asked if I could sit down with him, he said of course. It was strange looking at the bars, and then it was normal. I asked him about it, I said it had been on my mind lately, him sleeping in the cell or in a cage, most slaves do not have arrangements like that. He said it was what he was used to, he sees the bars as a wall, like a normal bedroom. When he first had to move to the basement in Canada, he felt it was “not fair”, but Erik was so pleased to have a room mate, he made it very easy for him, and it became his room, his space, and that's how he feels about it here. Of course if I wanted to change it and have him share the bedroom, he is fine with it. I replied I like our set up, we both get a good night's sleep, and it makes the time- if we share a bed - more special, and I like it when he wakes me up. He is a very early riser, and I like to sleep longer. He goes to bed early, I am often up until late.

We had finished the tea, he asked if he can rest longer. I know from before, if he does not get his rest, he is very cranky and we end up arguing about nothing, so of course I let him rest, his health is very important to me.

We had a note from our neighbours, they are selling their house. They used it as a weekend and summer house for at least 3 generations, but now the next generation have houses somewhere else, and the couple do not use it much anymore. They will probably make a mint on it. It is a very small, very old hut, someone will probably want to tear it down and build something proper. Maybe I will cancel the cutting of the leylandi this year, and let them grow a bit higher. Ben and I like to play outside.

I cleaned the car, I am sure the dealership will do it anyway, but otherwise Ben would have done it, and it is not good for his abdomen. We drove to the club, the builders have vacated it enough to give us the space to set up. The new signs were going up, it looked great. Ben, Martin and I had our photo taken in front of it, we decided to use a rainbow flag on the signs to indicate to passers-by what to expect here. We are expecting a drinks delivery tomorrow, and will have a soft opening on Wednesday with some members, and officially open on Friday. It will be good to be back in business!

Getiing on with life

Thursday, 23^rd February

Well, the tattoo is finished. It has been quite sore all week, but I rather had it done closely together. Ben says it is exactly how he “saw” it. He says it makes look more “master”.

The builders are getting on fine, we will be ready for opening in the next few days. The flat will take a few more days, and they have started on the outside, although of course that will be an ongoing project until the summer. We moved some stuff from the flat to the club today, every staff member with a car took something and we managed to do it within 2 trips. The car is going back on Tuesday, I have had a letter from the company, offering me the car at a preferred rate, but we decided against it. We sometimes used it just to use it. There has been a lot of talking and planning for us, we have decided to move back to the house and move there permanently.

The other day we were getting it on on the sofa, until the boy remembered the security camera footage, and we both lost interest. It was actually then that we talked about our living arrangements.

We are going to move stuff back this weekend. It is kind of sad, we were so happy here at the beginning. Now we both do not feel quite at home here, it is somewhere to stay. Like a furnished apartment. We will be looking for a permanent tenant, and I am quite prepared to do some building work, I think it is unlikely we will find someone who wants a cell.